All in the Family Episode: The Games Bunkers Play

This episode first aired in November 1973, and I think I would still remember it, even without the fact that the episodes of this popular and famous television series have been shown innumerable times over the decades to reinforce my memory; and besides, I have the dvd box set. hahahaha But really, this was a memorable episode. Being able to face criticism and to look at ourselves in the mirror is not easy for most of us; perhaps, all of us. Sometimes our feathers get ruffled, but we then settle down and get over it, and we even accept our flaws and mistakes; at least, to some degree.

Cast for this episode:

Carroll O'Connor as Archie Bunker

Jean Stapleton as Edith Bunker 

Rob Reiner as Mike Stivic

Sally Struthers as Gloria Bunker Stivic

Betty Garrett as Irene Lorenzo

Vincent Gardenia as Frank Lorenzo

Mike Evens as Lionel Jefferson

 

The episode opens with the Bunker family finishing their chicken dinner, but Gloria telling her mother that the chicken was a little under done, and Archie adding, "What do you mean, under done? It was alive. It was fighting me all the way down." He then says that Edith's dessert took charge though, because, "the apple pie is now holding him down and the ice cream is freezing him to death." hahaha Mike and Gloria have invited their neighbors Frank and Irene Lorenzo and Lionel Jefferson over to play a new game that evening, "Group Therapy," where the players are to tell how they really feel about themselves and about each other. When Archie previews a couple of the questions, he scoffs at playing the game and he goes out to drink some beer at the neighborhood bar. The Lorenzos show up, then in comes Lionel, and Mike immediately tells him about an article he read covering "the black problem" (if you are unfamiliar with "All in the Family," Lionel Jefferson was the neighbor of the Bunkers, and black). The group sits down to play the game, which has printed cards with questions or descriptions of something a player must do, and upon completion of the answer or action, the other players vote if that player was sincere ("With it!"), or faking it ("Cop out!). The players each have a playing piece that moves along a game board according to how the other players vote on their answers and actions. (Note: We never really see the details of the board, or learn what the goal is, but it's not important. I just added this so you get an idea of what's going on.) 

 

Edith goes first and the card says for her to tell the players which person in the world she would like to look like and why. Edith immediately answers, "Katharine Hepburn," and that Hepburn's eyes and hair are similar to Edith's, so that wouldn't upset Archie. (Comment: Edith is devoted to her husband and she knows how Archie can react negatively to new things, so this is her first thought.) She also says she liked Hepburn's voice in movies, and the whole group responds positively to Edith's answer by holding up cards saying "With it." Frank Lorenzo is next, and his card tells him to discuss the part of his body he is most proud of. (Comment: This is the same card that had sent Archie off to the bar to drink beer, as anything that might hint about sex made him uncomfortable; in fact, in more than one episode, if I remember right, even the word "sex" brought a quick "shush" from Archie. The sexual implication of the question is obvious, and while today audiences at a movie or stage show would likely chuckle a little at this "implication," in the early 1970s, this implication brought hysterical laughter from the audience, and likely "some" very uncomfortable people, as the subject of sex on television was highly controversial. "All in the Family" was filmed with a live audience present; thus, reactions from the audience are real and specific to what the audience saw and heard, and the filmed version was not provided with recorded laughter and audience reactions (called "laugh tracks"), which were quite common on television.) Anyway, Frank says he's most proud of his nose, and he goes onto say why, which gets Frank 4 votes of "With it," but then Irene tells the others Frank is most proud of his body, mainly his hairless chest, and this persuades the group to reverse their votes to "Cop out." 

 

Lionel is next and his card has him choose a player, to then stand back to back, and push against one another while Lionel tells the other person why it's hard for him to be direct with that person. Lionel chooses Mike, and they stand back to back, then Mike asks why it's hard for Lionel to be direct. Lionel tells Mike to look at what's going on, that Mike isn't really pushing, and Mike says he doesn't want to knock Lionel off balance, to which Lionel asks, "Would you push harder if I was white?" When Mike acts somewhat indignant about Lionel's statement, Lionel says Mike is always bending over backwards to agree with him, that he wants Mike to treat him like Lionel Jefferson and not a representative of the whole black race. Mike denies that he does that, but Lionel mentions that every time he sees Mike, Mike brings up about "the black problem" (Remember what Mike said when Lionel first came to the house that night). Mike asks if he should talk about the weather, and Lionel answers, "Sometimes yes, black people have weather too, you know. We get rained on and everything." Mike exclaims that Lionel was faking this whole thing, so he votes "Cop out," but the rest of the group votes "With it," displeasing Mike, but not totally getting under his skin. Gloria is next and the card says for her to tell the person closest in the group to her (in her life) something that will help that person. Gloria stands and goes to Edith. Mike immediately tells Gloria she's wrong, because he's the closest to her, because he's her husband and he wants Gloria to say whatever it is to him. So Gloria obliges by saying what she was going to say to her mother, "Michael, I think the dresses you've been wearing make you look older," which brings tremendous laughter from the audience, but it brings a very stunned looked to Mike's face. Mike is next and the card tells him to stand and tell the group what makes him mature. After Mike's behavior, this brings more laughter and some teasing facial expressions from Gloria. Mike starts by saying that he's tolerant of the other guy's opinions, but this brings an outburst of laughter from Gloria, plus a comment about how Mike and Archie argue. Mike says "Archie is a walking monument to intolerance," prompting Edith to briefly interrupt. Mike asks how many "With it" votes there are, but he gets all "Cop out" votes. After some more squabbling, Mike declares the rest of the group is dead wrong, but that he won't spoil the game. 

 

Irene draws a card that tells her to sit on the lap of the person who makes her nervous and to tell that person why they make her nervous. Irene goes over and sits on Mike's lap, which upsets him very much, but she tells him that they way he's acting about this game is making her very nervous. Mike votes "Cop out," but the others vote "With it," just rubbing more salt into the wounded Mike. Edith is next and her card says for her to tell one of the players something she's never said before, but that she'd like to say to them. Edith turns to Mike and says she doesn't like the way he's been acting so stuck up lately. Mike is surprised, and Edith continues, "I think it's mean to make fun of Archie and to call him names the way you do." Mike becomes more agitated, saying that Archie says dumb things and that Achie can't be taken seriously. He ends by saying, "C'mon ma, I have a brain." Edith replies by telling Mike that if he's really smarter than Archie, then he shouldn't let Archie see that. (There is applause from the audience) When the others in the group agree with Edith, Mike gets very upset and charges that they are ganging up on him. He says he doesn't want to play anymore, and he overturns the game board and cards, and runs up the steps. Gloria goes upstairs to Mike, but he's very angry and again mentions how Gloria chose her mother over him in the game. Gloria tells him it's possible to love two people at the same time, but in different ways. She also tells Mike he can't take criticism. After a few more minutes Mike settles down and goes downstairs where everyone is about to have tea. Mike has them all sit down, and he apologizes, but then he just can't stop himself from couching his apology in some self pity. This causes Mike and Lionel to raise their voices to one another and Mike challenges Lionel to do what Edith had done; that is, to say something to someone he has never said, but that he really wants to say. Lionel agrees, and he goes to Edith. He fumbles over his words at first, but then says that he and his family were very scared when they moved into the neighborhood, but that Edith was so welcoming to them, they knew they had one good friend no matter what happened. Lionel continues, "I don't know why it took so long to tell you this, but I'm very grateful." Edith thanks Lionel and she leans over and kisses him on the cheek. (Comment: Today, most people wouldn't even pay much attention to such a thing, but in those times, a white woman of any age even giving a friendly kiss on the cheek to a black man was likely to cause great anger among many people, especially whites, and likely far more so in the southern areas of the country. So this scene was a big deal back then and I'm glad they did it.) Mike is angry that Lionel was so nice to Edith and he asks why Lionel didn't criticize Edith, but Lionel says he didn't have any criticism. Mike gets angrier and challenges Frank to criticize someone, but Frank says he doesn't have any criticism. This brings Mike to say that Frank and Irene have been married for more than 20 years, and that Frank must have something to say to Irene, maybe about their sex life. Frank turns to Irene and thanks her, bringing laughter and applause from the audience. (Comment: Again, even saying something like that on television in those times was apt to cause heart palpitations in a part of the American population, but "All in the Family" challenged the traditional fear and discomfort of sexual topics by Americans.) Mike rants and says how Archie yells, but Gloria tells him he yells at her dad just as much as her dad yells at him. Mike says that Archie forces him to yell, but this brings Edith to tell Mike she doesn't think Mike yells at Archie because of Archie, but because of himself. She tells a story one of her teachers told them in school about a man who saved another man's life, but the man who was saved was not grateful, but rather he got madder and madder at the man who saved him. Mike flies off the handle again, saying that Edith is referring to the fact that he owes Archie a lot of money, but Edith tells Mike it's more than that, and that her teacher said when a person owes another person a lot, they can resent that person more and more because they begin worrying they'll never be able to pay the person back. Mike is somewhat less upset, but he ends up going to the kitchen. As Gloria starts to head to the kitchen to talk with Mike, Edith stops Gloria and instead she herself goes to talk with Mike.

 

In the kitchen, one of the best minutes of television history (in my opinion) takes place between Edith and Mike. Edith asks if Mike wants to know why Archie yells at him, and Mike says that Archie hates him. Edith tells him, "Oh no Mike. Archie yells at you because he's jealous of you." Mike scoffs and says he doesn't want to listen anymore, but Edith gets firm, grabs Mike by the arm and says, "Now wait a minute, you WILL listen to me. Archie is jealous of you." She tells Mike that it really isn't hard to understand, because Mike is going to college, but that Archie had to quit school to help support his family. "He ain't never goin' to be nuthin' more than he is right now. But you, you got a chance to be anything you want to be, that's why Archie's jealous of you. He sees in you all the things he could never be." Edith tells Mike to try to be a little more understanding with Archie and to think these things over,  she then goes back into the living room. (The audience applauds Edith's words to Mike!) 

 

Mike's facial expression shows he IS thinking it all over, when through the back door comes Archie. As always, Archie immediately says, "Keep away from me, Meathead!" Mike says, "Arch, I wanna tell you something ... I understand," and he grabs Archie and hugs him, leaving Archie totally perplexed.          

            

 

Photo is of the 2005 Sony Pictures Home Entertainment Fourth Season DVD set 

WORD HISTORY:

Couch-This word has noun and verb forms, and the history of the word is interesting, although a bit shaky as to its actual Indo European ancestor. If its ancient ancestor is as below, then it is distantly related to "stall" (the noun: place for animals, small business stand, a tactic to delay doing a particular activity), also the verb form "stall" (to halt, come to standstill, to avoid taking action on something), and to "still" (the adjective meaning 'quiet, stable,' later also used as a noun), which are from the Germanic roots of English, but with the "delay tactic" meaning for "stall" likely coming via French, which had it from (Germanic) Frankish from the same Germanic source as the English words, and to "install/installation," again based upon Germanic, but borrowed by Latin and then by English (the verb "install" likely had French reinforcement), and also "location," a word of Latin derivation borrowed directly from Latin by English. The word "couch" is really a prefixed word. It goes back to Indo European "kom/ghem," which had the notion of "by, with, near, beside." This gave Latin "com" (and its variant form "con") meaning, "together, with," which is a common prefix in Latin-derived words. The main part of what became "couch" seemingly goes back to Indo European "stel," which had the notion, "to put into a place, to be in a place, to stand something in place." This gave Italic "stlocus,"^/^^ seemingly meaning, "a place, a location," with the beginning sound dropped in the Latin form, leaving "locus," meaning, "a definite place or position, a region." This gave Latin the verb "locare," meaning, "to place (in a position)," and the prefixed form with "com" was rendered as "collocare," meaning, "to place, to settle into a place, to put together." This passed to Latin-based Old French initially as "colchier," then as "couchier," meaning, "to go to bed, to lie down," and which then became "coucher" and produced the noun "couche," meaning, "a bed, a place to lie down, a place to sleep." English borrowed the verb in the early 1300s as "couchen,"^^^ meaning, "to lay down to rest/sleep," with a military meaning of "to lie in wait to spring an ambush, to lay low." The noun was borrowed in the mid 1300s, initially as "couche," and meaning, "a piece of furniture for resting or relaxing, often for more than one person, but capable of allowing a person to lie down for rest or sleep," but also, "an animal's lair" (typically a hidden place where an animal lives and sleeps"). The meaning "to talk about a difficult subject indirectly," seems to be from the military meaning of "lay low."   

 

^  Italic is a branch of the Indo European family of languages and includes Latin, Umbrian, Venetic, and others, most which have died out. Latin's own limited use today is mainly because its dialects evolved into several modern languages: Italian, French, Spanish, Portuguese, Rumanian, Catalan, Sardinian, and several others. 

 

^^ The ancestor of the Italic form "stlocus" is a problem, and not everyone agrees that its ancestor was "stel," but at this time, I have no reason to change my opinion. 

 

^^^ English typically used 'en' on the ending of verbs to form infinitives, just as its cousin, German, still does. In modern English we use 'to' to form infinitives: 'to go,' 'to read,' 'to eat,' but in the times of the 'en' endings (even earlier often as 'an'), there was no need to add 'to.'